[Copyright Library Aug 5 1865]
"Jeff’s Race for the Last Ditch[!]" (22 May 1865)
Dedicated to Lieut. Col. B. B. Pritchard, 5th Mich. Cavalry.
Words by W. Dexter Smith Jr.
Music by Fritz Eustace

Boston, MA: G. D. Russell & Company, 126 Tremont, opp. Park St.
F. N. Carter, Lith., Boston
[No. 277]
[Recorded Vol. 40. P.340]
[([deposited by] proprietor - May 22, 1865]
Plate No. 563
[Source: 200001052@LoC/IHAS/CWM]

1. Jeff did want to be let quite alone, alone,
That he might just establish his throne, his throne,
So he fought till he got almost blown, blown,
Did Mister Jefferson D,
So he fought till he got almost blown, blown,
Did Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we could n’t see!

CHORUS [sung after each VERSE]
’Twas funny when Jeff thought he could, he could,
Outwhip our loyal votes,
But funnier yet it was when he
Put on the petticoats!
But funnier yet it was when he
Put on the petticoats,
Put on  the petticoats!

2. Yes! he thought it was the best  of fun, of fun,
To go and starve our pris’ners and run, and run,
Has there e°er a meaner thing been done, done,
By Mister Jefferson D,
Has there e’er a meaner thing been done, done,
By Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we couldn’t see!

3. It takes two to play at ev’ry game, game,
And there is where old Jeff  was quite lame, lame,
So there’s no one but himself to blame, blame,
Dear Mister Jefferson D,
So there’s no one but himself to blame, blame,
Dear Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we couldn’t see!

4. Have you heard of his wonderful flight, flight?
How he traveled by day and by night, by night,
No one was ever in such plight, plight,
As Mister Jefferson D.
No one was ever in such plight, plight,
As Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we couldn’t see!

5. How he dressed himself up in his best, his best,
(Or his wife’s, as it must be confessed, confessed,)
For he always went quite nicely dressed, dressed,
Sweet Mister Jefferson D.
For he always went quite nicely dressed, dress,
Sweet Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we couldn’t see!

6. So he ran till he found the last ditch, ditch,
(And you can not tell t’othets from which, which,)
Oh! the scene that ensured was quite rich, rich,
Queer Mister Jefferson D.
Oh! the scene that ensued was quite rich, rich,
Queer Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we couldn’t see!

7. He forgot to change boots in the muss, muss,
And he took up a big blunderbuss, buss,
Yes! he threatened our hopes with a fuss, fuss,
Brave Mister Jefferson D.
Yes! he threatended our boys with a fuss, fuss,
Brave Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we couldn’t see!

8. His dear wife said they must form a ring, ring,
And that foul play was not quite the thing, thing,
So she tied him to her apron string, string,
Meed Mister Jefferson D.
So she tied him to her apron string, string,
Meek Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we couldn’t see!

9. And again his true wife loudly spoke, spoke,
That our boys must not Davis provoke, provoke,
If they did they might get their heads broke, broke,
Bold Mister Jefferson D.
If they did they might get their heads broke, broke,
Bold Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we couldn’t see!

10. Then he brandished his big butcher knife, knife,
And he called on his dear loving wife, wife,
But quite soon he gave up the brief strife, strife,
Kind Mister Jefferson D.
But quite soon he gave up the brief strife, strife,
Kind Mister Jefferson D.
Of the big Confed’racy,
Which we couldn’t see!

MORAL. 11. You mist learn not to fool Uncle Sam, Sam,
Or you’ll find the door shut with a slam, slam,
Yes! and somebody’s fingers will jam, jam,
Like Mister Jefferson D.
Yes! and sonebody’s fingers will jam! jam,
Like Mister Jefferson D.
And his big Confed’racy,
Which could never be.