"The Bowery" (1892)
Words by Charles H. Hoyt
Music by Percy Gaunt
from "A Trip to Chinatown"

1.
Oh! the night that I struck New York,
I went out for a quiet walk;
Folks who are "on to" the city say,
Better by far that I took Broadway;
But I was out to enjoy the sights,
There was the Bow'ry a blaze with lights;
I had one of the devil's own nights!
I'll never go there any more!

CHORUS
The Bow'ry, the Bow'ry!
They say such things,
and they do strange things
on the Bow'ry!
The Bow'ry!
I'll never go there any more!

2.
I had walk'd but a block or two,
When up came a fellow and me he knew;
Then a policeman came walking by,
Chased him away and I ask'd him why?
"Wasn't he pulling your leg," said he;
Said I "He never laid hands on me!"
"Get off the Bow'ry you Yep!" said he,
I'll never go there any more!

(CHORUS)

3.
I went into an auction store,
I never saw any thieves before;
First he sold me a pair of socks,
Then said he, "how much for the box?"
Someone said "two dollars!" I said "three!"
He emptied the box and gave it to me,--
"I told you the box, not the socks," said he,
I'll never go there any more!

(CHORUS)

4.
I went into a concert hall,
I didn't have a good time at all;
Just the minute that I sat down
Girls began singing "New Coon in Town,"
I got up mad and spoke out free,
"Somebody put that man out," said she;
A man called a bouncer attended to me,
I'll never go there any more!

(CHORUS)

5.
I went into a barber shop,
He talk'd till I thought he would never stop,
I, cut it short, he misunderstood,
Clipp'd down my hair just as close as he could;
He shaved with a razor that scratched like a pin,
Took off my whiskers and most of my chin;
That was the worst scrape I ever got in,
I'll never go there any more!

(CHORUS)

6.
I struck a place that they called a "dive,"
I was in luck to get out alive;
When the policeman heard my woes,
Saw my black eyes and my battered nose,
"You've been held up!" said the "copper" fly!
"No, sir! but I've been knock'd down!" said I;
Then he laughed, tho' I couldn't see why!
I'll never go there any more!

(CHORUS)