"Mr. Burns and His Wife" (20 May 1824)
Written and Composed
by a Gentleman of Maryland.
[P. Moore?]

[Source: 049/052@Levy]

1.
  Mister Burns and his wife
  Together had strife,
He wanted bread and butter with his Tea
  Says she I rule the roast
  I'll have a plate of toast
And to logger heads with him went she.

2.
  Now a certain Mr. Monroe,
  Live'd on the second floor,
A Man amazing strong on the wrist;
  He heard the noise and clutter,
  About the bread and butter,
So he knock'd down Mr. Burns with his fist.

3.
  "Mister Burns 'pon my life,
  You shall not beat your wife,
For 'tis both a sin and disgrace;"
  Then up steps Mrs. B.
  Mind your business Moore, says she,
And she sent a cup of tea in his face.

4.
  Oh! cried poor Mr. Moore,
  As he sneak'd out the door,
Surely I must be a fellow without brains;
  For when a man and wife are fighting,
  If a stranger [?] his might in,
He is sure to get [?] whip'd for his pains.